“When he was a little toddler, he fell from a metal ball 45 feet up in the air, thinking it was a jolly rancher. He had to go into surgery and was never the same again. When he went to preschool, he was the class clown, but he never knew who he was so he cried and cried.”
There was a person had no brains at all, who was the dumbest person on earth, but good looking, or handsome as the ladies would say. This is the story of the dumb person with no name. And who grew up with dogs in Texas.
Chapter one: dumb no name
When he was a little toddler, he fell from a metal ball 45 feet up in the air, thinking it was a jolly rancher. He had to go into surgery and was never the same again. When he went to preschool, he was the class clown, but he never knew who he was so he cried and cried. He walked home and dumped his face in a Central Park toilet because he thought it was a water fountain. Also, when he was in 3rd grade, he was bombarded by girls and thought it was Christmas and that he was Santa Claus in the middle of april. The first time he said something smart was when he was in the baby bottle store and he said, “MIIIILKKK!!!” The doctors ran a test on him and he was in the guinness world record for, guess it… THE DUMBEST PERSON (kid) IN THE WORLD!
Chapter two: dumb feats
He thought he could climb Mountain Dew. When his mom said it was chilly, he went outside and grabbed a bowl. He thought Nutella was a phone company for peanuts. He thought Chips Ahoy was a pirate ship. When the wanted to go to a train ride, he stood in front of his Playstation. He thought social media was a social tweet for birds. He thought KFC was a UFC for chickens. He tried to ride a Red Bull. This is all the epic dumb stuff he did. He got a job. He hated his life and quit his job.
Chapter three: A stupid spy
He was sent to London for special reasons and thought he won the lottery, but he was actually going to be a U.K spy. (Reason why: He thought his apartment building was red velvet cake and he saw a secret spy talking to the captain.) He went to the secret place and banged on the door and said, “SECRET SERVICE HELLO!” They opened the door and pulled no name in.
They all said, “Who is he?”
The captain said, “you was going to be the bait.”
No name said, “well, call the exterminator if there’s a nasty rodent around!”
Then everyone laughed at him.
No name turned and said, “ooh there’s a good comedy in america just like this one!”
Then they all pranced while almost laughing to death. They turned off the lights and no name said, “Now you need a Repairman.”
Epilogue
He went to Italy for his mission and he went down in history for diffusing the special bomb that would kill everyone. In the next three years, he would die of tripping off a cliff because these American soldiers were surrounding him. His last feelings were that he proved everyone that he wasn’t dumb.
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