Pink Is Pretty

Pink is pretty. She likes pink and the letters P and I and N and K, and her favorite thing to paint is her name. She does not like the color purple. She doesn’t like the color purple because in high school she had a best friend named Purple, but then Purple took her boyfriend. Her boyfriend’s name was Red. At high school prom, Pink wanted to go with Red, but Red said he was busy. So Pink went to prom with Blue. At the prom, she looked over to see what Purple was doing. Purple walked over to Red and started dancing. Red had said he was busy just so he could go to prom with Purple. Pink went over to Red and Purple and said to Red, “Oh, Red, I thought you were so busy you couldn’t even come to prom, and you’re here with Purple?” Pink and Purple got into a fist fight.

When colors fight, it’s a crayon with little arms, legs, a face, and a wrapper. First, Purple swung at Pink, but she ducked. Then she went down to the floor. She kicked Purple in the foot and then she fell. Yellow ran over to break it up. He went in the middle of them. He pushed Pink back, and then he pushed Purple back. Blue ran up to help Yellow. Yellow took Purple to the side and Blue took Pink to the side and told them to calm down.

So Pink went home and called Red. She told him that they were done. Then Red met up with White and he high-fived White. Pink saw that and punched Red in the face so hard she broke his tip. Then she walked White home and she said, “White, okay. I’m gonna warn you. Whenever Red tries to touch you, move. Because I’m done with him.”

Then she went back home. She told her mother what happened and then she cried. She called up Purple and she said, “Purple, meet me at the park.”

Pink tried to run Purple over with her car. Purple jumped out of the way. Then Red was there to catch her. So Pink went home to her dad’s garage and got his motorcycle. She went to Red’s house and she brought the motorcycle into his room. She closed the door and locked it. She started chasing Red around in the room with her dad’s motorcycle. She was chasing Red in circles. He was running and screaming.

Then she got a hammer.

She went to his game room. She started smashing up everything. They both had a picture of them on Christmas and she smashed it up a hundred times. And then she called up Orange, her new best friend, and she said, “Go to my house in five minutes. I’ll meet you.” She chased Red around his room once more and then she left him alone. She went and chased his parents around. Then she went back home.        

Orange was at her door. She let her in. They started talking about what happened. Orange thought that she should dump Red for good and find another boyfriend. Orange called up her boyfriend, Black and he called up his friends Gray, Dark Blue, Turquoise, Brown and Magenta. He said, “I’m giving you the option to get to know these guys and figure out which one you want to be your new boyfriend.” At first she examined Brown.

He said, “How ya doin’?” He had a French accent. Even though he was French, he talked a little slang.

And then she said, “Umm-mm.” She didn’t like the slang.

And then she went up to Gray and he said, “Hey, good looking.”

She said, “I’ll keep you in mind.”

And then she went to Magenta. He said, “Whatcha’ up to?” and she said,

“Keep you in mind, too.”

And then she went to Dark Blue and he said, “Hi. How was your day?”

And she said, “I’m gonna have to re-look over Gray and Magenta.”

Then after she went to Turquoise and Turquoise said, “What’s your name?”

In the end, she chose Dark Blue because he was nice and everybody else wasn’t really like him. They went out on a date at Coo Coo for Color. It was a fancy restaurant. They went to dinner. He paid for it all. And then the next day they talked to each other on the phone, and he came to  her house and gave her some flowers. He surprised her with a cake and he said, “Happy first date.”

On the way to school she ran into Red. Red said, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” on his knees. She called up Dark Blue. Dark Blue beat him up. He punched him in the face. He kicked him in his legs. And then he elbowed him in his stomach. And then she called up Purple.

She said, “Purple, come get your little boyfriend, Red.”

Purple went to Red and said, “What happened to you, boy?” And then she called an ambulance. Purple went with Red.

Dark Blue walked Pink to school and they went into a classroom. Orange sat at the window. Pink was in the second row. And Blue was in the third. Pink was in the middle of Orange and Dark Blue. Dark Blue and Pink kissed. Red tried to kiss Purple, but Purple said, “Pink was my best friend, I’m done with this.” Pink went over to Purple after class and Purple said, “I’m sorry that I went out with Red.”

Pink said, “If he came on to you, you should’ve known better not to go out with him in the first place. If you knew I was being lied to, why would you even do it?”

Purple said, “I know. But can you please give me another chance?”

Then Pink called over Dark Blue and then they went over to Red. And she said, “Dark Bluebeat up Red.”

“Glad to,” Dark blue said and he beat up Red. Pink called the principal and told the principal that Red tried to touch all the girls butts in the school. He got in trouble and he got expelled. Pink got her revenge. She and Purple became friends and since Pink found a boyfriend from Black, Pink called Black and told him to call his friends so Purple can choose a boyfriend from his friends just like Pink. Her boyfriend was Gray.

Pink said, “Just don’t ever do that again,” and gave Purple a hug.

Purple said, “Okay.”

Pink, Purple, Dark Blue and Gray all went out on a double date. Then Gray and Dark Blue ganged up on Red and then took his house and put him a shelter. And then Red never bothered any of them again.



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