Editor’s note: This story is inspired by and responding to “The Little Mermaid.”

About 5 million years ago, a mermaid lived in a cool town filled with short buildings with fancy carvings and beautiful mosaics. She swam through the fake blue water until she got to her father, the King.
He told her, “I strongly believe that you should go to The Surface of the Water.”
She said to the short, bearded, well-dressed man, “I HATE The Surface and I like The Water.”
Her father looked at her in a discouraging way, “Go now. Also, be back by 5:31 on the dot for dinner.”
She started to swim away.
“Oh, and don’t forget to do your homework!”
The mermaid, Ariel, did the breaststroke to her house, picked up her chorus homework, and went up to The Surface. Ariel practiced singing her scales. Then she felt the faintest drop of rain. 0.01 seconds later, a thunderstorm emerged from the not-so-puffy clouds. A man fell off the cracking ship. He plunged into the water. Eventually, his head emerged from the crashing water. He grabbed onto the rock right next to Ariel. She paid no attention to the struggling man and kept on with her chorus homework. The stranger’s eyes flickered open but Ariel had already left.
Later that week, Ariel went to school like any other day, but in science class, Miss Ursula had a new lesson in mind.
“Children! Last night I had a dream where mermaids could walk on Land. So, I want one of you ladies and gents to volunteer to be teleported to Land!”
No one wanted to explore Land. Miss Ursula walked around the room questioning every student to see if they truly did not want to go to Land.
She stopped by Ariel, stared at her, and finally said, “You shall go up! You’re the King’s daughter, so surely you should go…”
She slowly bent down and came close to Ariel’s face and then booped her on the nose and smiled a deranged smile.
The next day, Ariel was teleported to the Land. She went exploring and found the man she had seen drowning. He was in a very fancy house on the shore of the water. She wanted to go investigate, so she peered around the tall, three-story house. It was decorated with vines and wisteria, near the front door there were all types of different flowers, including chrysanthemums, red and white roses, and jasmine flowers framing the doorway.
She crept to the back and peered into the second-floor window, which was open, where the man now was being tailored into a very fancy suit. A posh man, with a long mustache, was serving him grapes and cheese on tiny toothpicks. The man being tailored saw her and yelled out the open window, “You look familiar! Come up here right now!”
Ariel did what the man ordered and went in the front door that led to a winding staircase, up to the room where the mysterious man was. She peeked her head in and the man ushered her in.
The man, who claimed his name was Prince Eric, asked her, “I saw you somewhere, but where?”
Prince Eric pondered for a bit then came back to reality. “Oh! I saw you when I fell off that ship 2 days ago. You were singing so beautifully, what were you singing?”
“I was practicing my chorus homework. I was just singing ‘He’s a Jolly Good Fellow’.”
Then some time passed and Ariel and Prince Eric married and lived not very happily-ever-after.