Native American Legend

Manhattan, 1657


Vulture Victor gave a bank worker $1,000 to put in his account. He earned $1,000 in trade, from trading his chicken eggs for money. As he was walking home, he sat down by this beautiful tree in the green hills of Manhattan. Then he picked some apples off the tree, for it was an apple tree, and ate them. He thought, What a fine day it is. Then the apple lulled him to sleep, as it was a magic apple, with a spell casted by Mellow Miser, Crafty Thief, PhD at Stealing Stuff and wanted by the police.

Before he fell asleep, Mellow Miser jumped out of a bush and hypnotized him with a spell that lasted two minutes.

Mellow Miser said, “I am Mellow Miser and I am going to hypnotize you…”

Then he made Vulture Victor tell him the password to his bank account. Vulture said, “ABC123ILikeMe is the password.”

Mellow Miser was so thrilled that he de-hypnotized Vulture Victor and ran off to the bank.

Two hours later…

After Mellow Miser stole the money and had it in his hands, he ran over the nice grassy hills and through a garden full of sunflowers, all of them not facing toward the sun.

Something is wrong, he thought. “Why are the sunflowers not facing the sun? They’re facing the moon.”

He ran out of the garden and ran into Buffalo Cow. Buffalo Cow asked him, “What’s wrong?”

Mellow Miser said, “The sunflowers are not facing the sun! They’re facing the moon!”


Vulture Victor had just woken up. He had no idea what he was doing, but he just remembered one word, maybe two: mellow and bank. Mellow sounded suspicious, so Vulture Victor started thinking of everyone’s name, but no animals names were Mellow or had Mellow in it, so he started thinking about people. That left one person, Mellow Miser. He was shocked.


Vulture Victor ran to where he pray to the spirits, for they were important to him. He saw the spirit animals, the ones that represented him. The spirits told him to find someone caring and courageous, so he scanned through the names of everyone again. That left two people. Sitting Bird, who was a police officer, and Buffalo Cow. So he ran to Buffalo Cow’s wigwam. He told Buffalo Cow the news.


So that’s why Mellow Miser was carrying $1,000 in his hand, Buffalo Cow thought. And why sunflowers weren’t facing toward the sun. The sunflowers must’ve known that something was wrong.

“We need to tell Sitting Bird, the police officer,” said Buffalo Cow.

10 minutes later…

They reached Sitting Bird’s long house, out of breath, sweltering, and almost out of oxygen. A totem pole was standing on the ground next to the door. It was a bird–red, green, blue, yellow, and orange, and maybe a little speck of pink, or dots of black. There was this curvy beak and the animal somehow looked like a raven.

They ran in the house and told Sitting Bird about everything. Sitting Bird said that he would come, but first they had to stop Mellow Miser or at least delay him.

So Buffalo Cow ran to Mellow Miser’s wigwam. Mellow Miser was packing up his stuff to go to a nearby village so he wouldn’t be caught. When Mellow Miser was all ready, Buffalo Cow and Vulture Victor burst into his wigwam. They meant to delay him for seven seconds.

Buffalo Cow stood at the door. Mellow Miser kicked him in both shins and Buffalo Cow collapsed. Mellow Miser ran out the door and Vulture Victor screamed, “Sitting Bird, where are you!?”

About 10.3 seconds later…

Sitting Bird came. “Where’s Mellow Miser? Where’d he go?”

“There!” screamed Vulture Victor, pointing to the north.

Sitting Bird ran toward where Vulture Victor pointed. In five seconds, he was out of sight, for he could run three miles in five minutes — actually, that’s not right, just say three minutes and 49 seconds, that’s how fast he is.

One day later…

A tired, overheated Sitting Bird burst through Vulture Victor’s door, dragging Mellow Miser by his hand. His moccasins were drenched in disgusting dirt that looked liked dog dung. His fur clothing was covered in mud. He collapsed and fainted as soon as he burst through the door.

Vulture Victor took Mellow Miser’s hands and dragged him to Buffalo Cow’s wigwam. He was in the middle of telling Buffalo Cow what he was going to do, but before Buffalo Cow could respond, Sitting Bird burst through the door and said, “So what do you want to do about him?”

Buffalo Cow waited for his moment to say his response to what Vulture Victor said. “Mellow Miser should not go to jail and Vulture Victor should forgive him. It is just a human habit to take money. Everyone probably has stolen something in their life at least once. Maybe a pencil, or an eraser, or something that’s not important, but you should always forgive others. Always.” He turned to Mellow Miser. “You should give Vulture Victor his $1,000 back.”

Two hours later…

Everyone was happy, including Vulture Victor who got his $1,000 back and Mellow Miser who didn’t have to go to jail.

Two days later…

Buffalo Cow was swimming in the river. Then he lost his energy and fainted in the river. He managed to say one word, “Help!” He screamed with all his might.

Mellow Miser heard his scream from one mile away. He knew it was Buffalo Cow’s voice and he decided to repay him for telling Vulture Victor not to send him to jail.

For he is caring, thought Mellow Miser, and so should I.

He ran as quickly as a peregrine falcon diving into water to get a fish. When Buffalo Cow’s head was just about to sink in the water, Mellow Miser jumped into the river — splash! — and pulled him out. Then he ran to the doctor’s office immediately.

Buffalo Cow eventually recovered and he became good friends with Mellow Miser, who changed his name to Mellow Giver. Eventually, they lived their lives and went to the death spirits.



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