John felt sick so his father told him to eat soup. He started to eat the soup and when he got to the bottom he found a squirrel in the soup.
He said, ”Daddy, can you get me a different type of soup? This soup has a squirrel in it.”
The dad gave him a different type of soup and then when he got to the bottom again, there was a piece of the moon.
He said, “Daddy, I need another soup, this one has a piece of the moon in it!” Then the dad gave him another type of soup, but this one had a key in it. The boy said,
“Dad this one has a key in it, can you get a different type of soup that is guaranteed to not have things in it?”
So the dad got him another soup, and there was a jetpack in it.
The boy said, “Ooh! Yay! Jetpack!” So he got it out, plugged in the key, turned it, the jetpack started, and he flew around the whole world. When he came back the father was waiting for him and he was very angry. He took the jetpack away, gave it to John’s mom, and she flew it but she didn’t know how to operate it and she died. The father tried it, and the same thing happened. Every person in the whole world tried it, even the animals, and they all failed. The boy thought he could rule the world, but there was one old man with a bunch of horses who were not stupid and they went and beat the kid up and John died. The old man ran to outer space on a spaceship with a horse, the horse was flying with the jetpack. The horse flew outside of the atmosphere, and the old man took the jetpack back and a different spaceship came along and shot the horse and blasted it to bits because it froze into ice and died. Then, I came along. I got the jetpack and the horses, the old man died, and I became a rodeo maker with a jetpack. I’m the only person in the whole wide world and I would never want any kids so it will be just myself and I’m immortal, I can get food for free, and I live happily ever after.