The Poison Hotdog

Act One

Scene 1

MOLE GIRL

What are you doing Buuck

BUCK

I’m just waiting in line for my hotdog, but now I think it will come up.

MOLE GIRL

What’s that supposed to mean. He yar. Sorry I have he yar ittis, hei.

BUCK

Yeah…

LUNCH LADY

Next in line for a hotdog, oh and just a reminder: one of these hotdogs is poisoned. As if I care, though.

BUCK

That’s mine. Bye!

LUNCH LADY

Here you go, uhgg it’s you.

BUCK

You hate everyone at this school.

LUNCH LADY

Next!

BUCK

Hi guys, guess who I ran into in line for lunch.

JACK

Creepy Mole girl.

JOESF

She has a name!

JACK

Yeah, but no one wants to know it.

BUCK

Ugh. This hotdog tastes horrible!

COOL CLAIR

I over heard some ones hotdog tastes horrid. Rumor says that if your h-dog tastes hor you have the poisoned one.

BUCK

My stomach hurts!

 

Scene 2

SCHOOL NURSE

It looks like you did get the poisoned hotdog. I’m afraid if this hotdog stays in your body you might have to go to the hospital!

BUCK

Do I  have school leave early today?

Joesf:  More importantly, will he be okay?

SCHOOL NURSE

Yes, and I’m sorry but maybe.

BUCK

Should I go and grab my backpack?

SCHOOL NURSE

Yes.

Scene 3

BUCK

Guys I’m really nervous, do you know if I’ll be okay?

JOESF

We don’t know, we know it’s okay to be nervous right now.

JACK

Don’t be a scaredy-cat. Be a cool-cat.

JOESF

Are you insane, or do you have brain problems?

BUCK

Guys we have to tell the teacher that I’m leaving early.

JACK

Don’t be a goodie two-shoes

BUCK

I’m just worried, what if I die. I feel pain within me. Dieing!

Act Two

Scene 4

JOESF

Buck just died from the poisoned hotdog.  

MOLE GIRL

Oh no! Buck is dead. I hate the Lunch Lady.

JACK

Yes, no one panic.

JOESF

Yes panic, Buck is dead.

MOLE GIRL

My highschool sweetheart. The Lunch Lady ruined my life!

Scene 5

PRINCIPAL DANTESI

How come one of your hot dogs are poisoned.

LUNCH LADY

You don’t care about these children as much as I do. I mean we both hate these children as much as I do.

PRINCIPAL DANTESI

True, but I and the school could be sued for a lot of money.

LUNCH LADY

I know, but what’s the biggest harm 1 poisoned hotdog can do.

PRINCIPAL DANTESI

He died! But since I don’t care you’re off the hook. Now let’s call the parents.

MOM

(off stage) Well hello there friend. I don’t mean if this call is to take time from your work. What’s this happy call at the middle of the day about?

PRINCIPAL DANTESI

(on stage)   Your son ate a poison hotdog made by the Lunch Lady and it killed him

MOM

My god. That’s so horrible. I call to have a moment with my husband.

Scene 6

MOM

I just got a call that are son has died from lunch.

POP

My dear Buck, dead. This is horrible.

MOM

The hotdog was made by their Lunch Lady.

POP

Well pardon my words, but we’ve got to sue that Lunch Lady.

MOM

We can’t sue her without going to court.

POP

Then we shall go to court.

MOM

I’ll make the call. Mmhmm.  Mmmhm. Thank you. Be ready for court tomorrow.

Scene 7

MOM

Your honoer, my son was innocently going to school when he had a poisoned hotdog and died all because of that stupid, dumb Lunch Lady.

JUDGE

I’m sorry, we are talking about a kid in this court so please don’t use those words.

LUNCH LADY

I didn’t know he would get the poisoned hotdog that I made, okay I did know he’d get the poisoned one I gave it to him.

JUDGE

Why did you give it to him?

LUNCH LADY

He was always Saying I hate everyone at the school and interrupting me and my thoughts.

JUDGE

I sentence you to 25 years in jail, and instead of you sueing her  she will pay everything for your son’s funeral. Now everybody can be happy (quietly) I hope!

           THE END

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